God, I wonder what happens now with the human race that we
all have Internet alter egos. These bastard alter egos are all of a sudden
opinionated, and judgemental, and abusive to strangers. These alter egos that
live tapping keyboards that didn’t exist 10 years ago. Our kids are now going to grow up with two personalities,
when you and I just got introduced to ours recently. Their alter egos will have developed alongside
them because they always knew a keyboard, text message half-self that would
courageously type away a controversial thought or judgement or joke, one which
their regular self would never dare say.
We are just now being introduced to this person who just
used to whisper in the back of our minds, never dare making a public appearance
(except for the possible late night after 2 too many wines nights.
Who are these people? Do you like yours? I really like some peoples; it makes them
funnier, and more outgoing. Some IAE’s
bring out peoples caring side, their “Hey, I CARE” personality. My IAE?
It’s me after too many wines. I
am in person, and otherwise, offensive,
loud, opinionated, and judgemental, but I am honest. Fully honest. I think my IAE is even more
honest than I am, but she can’t type fast enough to explain herself. She doesn’t understand that typing has no intonation,
it has no sarcastic tone, my IAE doesn’t get there is no tone at all, so her
sarcasm gets taken as “huge bitch.” When she was really just trying to be
funny.
But then enter the ASSHOLES!
Those who’s IAE’s are real dicks. Judgemental, and nasty to a painful
state. These people known for being meek
and mild, all of a sudden come out of the woodwork with Satan’s spew released
through their IAE’s. Their IAE’s are
dick heads! They are racist, sexist, homophobic, arrogant
pricks, and it just flows on out! They are arrogant, and feast on the
confrontation. They confront everyone with Thor’s Staph, dominating with their
self-diagnosed genius. Everyone is an idiot, but them…to them.
Then, comes those who’s
Internet Alter Ego is one that responds to these people with rioting
vengeance. They throw down with no holds
barred, throw down and stand up for the injustices’ of the world, but only
behind a screen. People honestly
believing they are saving the environment by posting Memes about how to do so,
all the while driving SUV’s to jobs as
office employee’s. The same people who wouldn’t stand up for anyone outside of
the comfort of their living rooms.
We all know what internet alter ego’s really are
though. They are just us amplified. The
reality, I believe however, is every one of those alter ego personalities live
within each of us. It’s just who’s
honest enough to admit it.
We are ALL judgmental dick heads in our heads. We all are
mean, and nasty, caring, kind, funny and sweet.
We all laugh at the stupid cat video, and we all secretly think our
friends are idiots. We all roll our eyes, tell the bully to F off, stand up for
the little guy. We all keep someone on
our Facebook friends list just because their life is an entertaining train wreck.
We all secretly love that we only have to communicate with family by way of
typing, as calling half of them would make you want to jab yourself in the eye
with a fork. We all drive cars, and
don’t recycle everything possible, while still posting Facebook Memes about how
to save the environment.
The reality is our Internet
Alter Egos, are all exactly the same.
They are us, after a few glasses of wine too many. They are the voices that used to whisper, and
now type. It’s still quiet as it spreads
on the paper, it just seems to get louder as others read and respond….with
their internet alter egos.
